My name is Rory. I am an ADHDer. I am proud of being an ADHDer. I prefer ADHD Pride Month, but I understand not everyone feels this way – so I try to aim for acceptance first.
I had and do have significant challenges of living each day as an ADHD person, and I have strengths also. I am a lifelong learner, I have divergent creativity, I am loving, I have a lot of perspective from a lifetime being misunderstood, and I like to make people laugh.
I live by core values – Reciprocal Learning, Empathy, Ethics, Inclusion, and Versatility.
I live just outside a small country town called Waipu, Whangārei District, Te Tai Tokerau (Northland), Aotearoa (New Zealand).
I am an anti-racist. I advocate for abolition. I am a practicing Stoic philosopher – augmented with intersectional feminism.
I am a married non-binary bisexual masc with they/them (phasing out he/him when I can change them legally) pronouns. I am 38 years old.
I have co-occurring Autism, OCD (Moral Scrupulosity), dyspraxia, dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyscalculia, and aphantasia (no mind’s eye – I am not a visual thinker – but a spatial one). I also have anxiety and depression – although mine are from the over stimulation due to sensory sensitivity and an unaccommodating world.
I have Crohn’s disease – an autoimmune condition that affects my intestines and often causes chronic pain. I have lost some of my bowel already due to this. This was I believe now the result of my unidentified neurodivergence.
I am an ADHD/Autism Coach, an independent researcher, advocate, and writer who writes about mental health issues, abolition, poverty, and other social issues.
I have a Bachelor of Software Engineering (Game Development Major), Diploma in Film and Television (Production Management Major), and nearly a full Bachelor of Arts (Psychology, Criminology Major) – I had to withdraw due to Crohn’s Disease flares from stress and a lack of accommodations.
I got all of these without realising I was an ADHDer, dyslexic, dysgraphic, dyscalculic, OCD, and Autistic person (although I had ADHD diagnosed but untreated during the last half of my software engineering degree).
I have worked consistently since I was sixteen. I have worked in retail, as a barista, telesales, telecommunications, IT support, and game development. I have been a programmer on six game titles for PC and mobile – including two for Autistic children (before I even realised I was Autistic).
I have had substance use problems in the past, but they were a result of self-medicating for many of my unidentified neurodivergent differences, and I feel no shame in having done this to survive. I wouldn’t recommend it for others, but I know why I did this.
My life has been hard, often so hard that people cannot believe I am still here and before my Autistic identification – I thought may be they might be correct. I have had a gauntlet of trauma from every facet of my life – a lot of it was of my own making due to not understanding myself – and acting immorally to fit in. I have Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and OCD as a result.
Daily blog challenge
October is here usually known as ‘ADHD Awareness Month’ – but IMO we ADHDers deserve more than that – we deserve acceptance. We need to be listened to, we need realistic accommodations, and help. We need to start moving toward ADHD Pride Month. People should be able to feel proud of being ADHDers, because the alternative is shame.
For the next 31 days I will be writing every day on being an ADHDer using this list of prompts:
- Day 1: Introduction
- Day 2: What I love about being an ADHDer is…
- Day 3: My Identification/Discovery Story
- Day 4: Reactions to Identification
- Day 5: Hobby Graveyard
- Day 6: Supports and Appreciation
- Day 7: The ADHDer Community
- Day 8: Favourite ADHDer Blogs/Comics
- Day 9: Favourite ADHD Owned Business
- Day 10: Sensory Seeking/Aversion
- Day 11: Fidgets and Stims
- Day 12: Favourite ADHD Charity
- Day 13: Family
- Day 14: Order from Chaos
- Day 15: Everyone Should Know
- Day 16: Work/School
- Day 17: ADHD People I Admire
- Day 18: Someday…
- Day 19: I Love it When…
- Day 20: Communication Style
- Day 21: One thing other people don’t understand…
- Day 22: Dispel a myth
- Day 23: Can’t Live without…
- Day 24: ADHD Political Issue
- Day 25: Symbols
- Day 26: Favourite ADHD Book
- Day 27: Identity Language
- Day 28: Dealing with Boredom
- Day 29: Favourite Memes
- Day 30: Hyperfocus
- Day 31: Acceptance Means…