The artist for the above image is @Kayas_Kosmos.
TW / CW // Ableism, suicide ideation, abuse, trauma
Being Autistic should be awesome!
I don’t need a cure. I’m not a disease. I have challenges that make life hard. But the Autistic mind is truly beautiful. It sees the world in a unique way – my family has had Autistic traits as far back as I can find in history (938AD during the Viking invasion of England).
My family has fought in World Wars, campaigned for women’s rights, protested against segregation, protested against corsets. They have stood up to harmful and ignorant practices for generations. They have been inventors, navigators, politicians, naval engineers.
When you talk about curing Autism. You are talking about eradicating me. My family. Everything that I love about this world inside me would be erased.
There’s no such thing as ‘high functioning’ and ‘low functioning’ – it’s about your ability to communicate usually.
Some of my family has had “severe” impairment. Some has not.
I was a “severe” child who got good at figuring out when he could be “severe” at the right times. I wrote a Twitter thread on this:
Here’s the truth. Your Autistic child is having a ‘tantrum’ usually over pain you’ve taught them to ignore, emotional, physical, sensory – or they can’t communicate what is wrong. I bashed my head on walls because it acts as an interrupt for rumination, I meltdown due to noise.
I wanted to die because I was taught I didn’t belong. I overcorrected a lot. I swung between extremes trying to be the person they wanted. I AB tested till I was accepted. I did this constantly. I still do.
If your kid wants to not exist at a young age. That’s usually on the situation. If I took an IQ test as a child I would have been ‘intellectually disabled’. I have dysgraphia and dyscalculia. I didn’t score well on standard IQ tests. It was luck for me in many ways I survived.
Just. Love. Your. Child. Never assume they want to act out. I never knew why I did the things I did, but people always assumed I knew. I had no interoception. I didn’t know how to tell. I have OCD because I’ve been called atrocious, naughty, psycho, stupid, a troublemaker.
We need you to fight ableism, not your child. We don’t need to be trained out of our Autism, we need to be embraced and understood. The systems aren’t suitable for us. The science is wrong. The school system sucks.
I was both mature and immature. I was smart and ‘stupid’. I was ‘lazy’ and hardworking. I was passionate and uninterested.
I was, and I still am, a paradox.
I just have despair constantly. I can’t stop analysing everything in my life because I’m analytical by nature. I see things I know are wrong and I’m truly powerless to tell people how to help, because I don’t know. I can only discuss me. Assume competence always.
I’m going now cause I know I’ve reached my limit. This rant was partially a meltdown. I can’t see people hurting their kids or thinking it’s ok. I never wanted to be bad but I did bad things. There’s a special place in hell for parents who ECT their children.
I got so much of my childhood memories back and now I have cPTSD from remembering. I gaslight myself out of trauma, sometimes you train yourself to forget.
Daily blog challenge
I will be writing every day on being Autistic for April using this list of prompts:
Alt-Text Format with links to other blogs – Autistic Acceptance Month – 30 Days of Acceptance and appreciation:
- Day 1 – Introduction
- Day 2 – What I love about being Autistic is…
- Day 3 – My diagnosis/discovery story
- Day 4 – Reactions to “coming out
- Day 5 – Special Interests
- Day 6 – Supports and Appreciation
- Day 7 – The Autistic Community
- Day 8 – Favorite Autistic Blog
- Day 9 – Favourite Autistic-owned Business
- Day 10 – Sensory Life
- Day 11 – Stims
- Day 12 – Favorite Autism-charity
- Day 13 – Family
- Day 14 – Routine
- Day 15 – Everyone should know…
- Day 16 – Work/School
- Day 17 – Accommodations
- Day 18 – Someday…
- Day 19 – I hate it when…
- Day 20 – Communication
- Day 21 – One thing other people don’t understand
- Day 22 – Dispel a myth
- Day 23 – Can’t live without…
- Day 24 – Political Issue
- Day 25 – Symbols!
- Day 26 – Favorite Autism book
- Day 27 – Identity Language
- Day 28 – Dealing with meltdowns
- Day 29 – Famous Autistics
- Day 30 – Acceptance means…